Choosing a partner is extremely important to your personal happiness, so getting it right is imperative!
The good news is that you’re in full control of this situation and what you put in is what you will get out.
I have found it’s critical you know exactly what qualities you want in a partner.
Not having any success in finding your life partner?
Are you going round and round in circles, same relationship, different face?
Frustrated with the results so far?
You should know what you want in and from a partner. If you aren’t clear, you’ll take anything and you’re worth more than that!
Mistake Number One
One mistake most women make when embarking on this journey is not being clear what they want in a partner or knowing the type of relationship they’re looking for.
Do you have high expectations, a long list of what you would like? Or do you have low expectations, willing to settle for who ever shows up, crossing fingers and hoping for the best?
Whether you have high or low expectations it’s usually a reflection of how you value yourself and indicates the level of self worth you have. Are you willing to settle for an ‘ok’ relationship or will you stay the course, not deviate and wait until Mr Right enters on the scene. The choice is yours…keep in mind to find Mr Right you have to know who he is when you bump him to him, as he might be in “disguise!”
Mistake Number Two
Another critical mistake is timing. We live in a society that demands instant gratification. Many aren’t willing to wait until the time is right.
Yes some of you may have biological clocks ticking, and the need to partner up with someone to have a child is overwhelming. If this is you, let me ask this question of you; Would you rather
A) Have a child with Mr Johnny On The Spot, as in any partner just to turn off the “maternal alarm” and live a unfulfilled life, which really isn’t good for anyone including the beautiful soul you’ve bought into this world?
B) Take it slow and steady, ending up with Mr Right, a partner you connect with at heart and soul level? You may risk not having a child if you wait too long, so make sure you get some help to get the relationship right with yourself first. When you’re confident and have let go of any past relationships, the energy is clear for a relationship to manifest.
You may have been divorced, separated, be caring for children or parents and you don’t feel the time is right?
In my experience, timing is everything. I’ve seen so many of my clients who thought they were doing the right thing, putting everyone else first, waiting for their time to come. If you want to find a partner and you’re ready, go for it, there’s no time like now!
Mistake Number Three
Another critical mistake women make when looking for a partner is what I like to call the Gooey Feeling…picture this; your eyes meet; you feel the tingles down your spine; your non rational brain says yep! this is ‘THE ONE’ and whammo, your chemicals are going crazy. You rational brain goes out the door, in no time you’ve fallen in lust; then letting go of all the things you wanted and valued. I’ve seen so many people go too deep too quickly, without really getting to know each other fully first. Relationships take time, and they need to be nurtured, even planned and given priority. You have to know who you are and what you want if you want a relationship to be successful.
My advice is…
- Be clear on what you want in a partner/relationship and get help so you are clear and ready
- Give yourself time to find the right partner, there’s no rush
- Don’t let the Gooey stuff override the getting to know you stuff…look before you leap!